NC Fall Symposium How to Cope with Emptiness

NORTH CAROLINA
2021 FALL SYMPOSIUM

HOW TO COPE WITH EMPTINESS

Below is a video of all seven of our presenters at our fall symposium. Please take the time to view this video and learn more of what our symposium entails. It is getting very exciting!!

october_symposium_promo_full_-_compressed.mp4
File Size:	171497 kb
File Type:	mp4

Download File

Family Access-Fighting for Children’s Rights, in conjunction with the Steel Partners Foundation, is pleased to announce a one-day Symposium for alienated parents, grandparents, and other family members to be held this coming Fall. The Symposium will take place on Saturday, October 16, 2021. The theme is “Dealing with Emptiness.” As one might expect from that theme, the presentations will focus on how targeted parents and grandparents can cope with this particularly devastating type of psychological and emotional abuse. The speakers are not only specialists in parental alienation but experts in how to better handle and manage such problems. This will not only be an informative and helpful conference, but an uplifting one. Although primarily intended for family members, mental health and legal professionals who deal with parental alienation are also likely to find it worthwhile. Additional information, including a list of the speakers and their specific topics, are listed below. There is limited seating and rooms available so now is the time to register for both.

On Friday night, October 15, 2021, we will have a Meet and Greet event from 6-9 PM. Rev. Dr. John Killinger will be our guest speaker. Dr. Killinger's late wife Annie was the pioneer to bringing grandparent alienation to the forefront. It will also be a time to meet our experts as well as others who are also in this "hell on earth called alienation". Many other professionals will be there too.

On Saturday, October 16, 2021 from 8-5, our experts will be presenting on how to cope with emptiness. There also will be a time of Q & A at the end of the symposium.

On Saturday evening from 6:30-9, we will have a closing dinner and spending time sharing our stories together.

We also will be giving out door prizes when you are registering at the front desk. We have planned many special things for you during this event. We do hope you can join us.

There will be a limit of 150 participants so this will be on a first come, first served basis. Many of you have asked for something like this for some time. Getting together with others who share this "hell on earth call alienation" will be a huge help for all of us. There will be many special things taking place while we are spending this time together. I do hope you can join us.

Sign up to Share your Story at the Symposium

We will have a special time on Saturday night of the symposium for those who wish to share their story to have 2-3 minutes to do so. You must register in advance to do so by emailing familyaccessinnc@aol.com. You also must be registered for the symposium before registering to speak. These slots will be given on a first come, first served basis.

Marriott at Research Triangle Park
4700 Guardian Drive
Durham, N. C. 27703-8460
(919) 941-6200

PLEASE USE THE LINK BELOW TO REGISTER FOR THE HOTEL

Book your group rate for How to Cope with the Emptiness Seminar

$99.00 Hotel room rates are quoted per room per night and are subject to applicable state and local taxes at time of check in. Taxes are currently 13.5%, but are subject to change. You may book 3 days prior to our event and stay 3 days after our event for this special group rate. (You may book as many as 4 people with 2 double beds for this price) There are of course king size beds available as well.

The Hotel is pleased to offer the following special concessions:

 Complimentary Airport Shuttle
 Complimentary Parking
 Complimentary WIFI in sleeping rooms & banquet space

*** This special discount rate expires Thursday, September 30, 2021. These rooms are available on a first come, first served basis. Please reserve your room in a timely manner.

Vendors

We have only seven vendor tables available now for our event. You may set up your table after 2 PM on the Friday of the event. You will need to man your booth prior to the meet and greet and before and after the symposium. Your business will also be listed on our web page for this event as well. All vendors will be subject of approval. Registration for vendors ends on Saturday, September 25th. If you have any questions, please email familyaccessinnc@aol.com.

DEADLINE TO REGISTER FOR THE SYMPOSIUM IS THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 30, 2021!!

SPEAKERS

DIRECTOR
PRESENTER
STEVEN MILLER, M. D.

"How Alienated Parents and Grandparents Can Use Recent Developments in Cognitive Science to Reduce Stress and Distress"

Few things in life are more difficult or painful than the loss of normal contact with a child or grandchild due to parent or grandparent alienation. It is therefore not surprising that alienated parents and grandparents typically experience anxiety, depression, and other types of severe emotional distress. Likewise, to echo the main theme of this conference, they typically experience feelings of helplessness, hopelessness, and emptiness. The ideal solution, of course, is to reverse the alienation and undo the damage to each relationship.

Unfortunately, in some cases that is not possible, and in other cases that requires months or years. Meanwhile, most alienated parents and grandparents need all the help they can get.

Fortunately, recent advances in cognitive science – for example, new techniques for changing not only the functioning of the brain but the underlying structure as well (e.g., to physically “re-wire“ the “circuits” involved with happiness, resilience, and other characteristics) – can bring about real changes in our ability to deal with stress, cope with adversity, and achieve peace of mind.

This presentation will present some of the most promising and pragmatic techniques for weathering the storm of parental and grandparental alienation. It will focus on relatively simple “mind over matter“ methods that are rooted in research and can be applied either with or without the assistance of a clinician and/or mental health professional. For illustration, in general the acronym CBT stands for cognitive behavioral therapy but, in fact, the “T“ can also stand for “Techniques“ because many people can employ similar techniques as part of a “self help” program, with or without the assistance of a psychotherapist.

Dr. Miller has degrees in both Psychology and Medicine from Brown University and did residency training at Brown University and Harvard Medical School. For more than 30 years he was on the teaching faculty at Harvard Medical School. He is board certified in both Internal Medicine and Emergency Medicine; in addition, he has many years of experience practicing Behavioral Medicine -- a specialty that focuses on the interface between medicine and psychology. That background is particularly relevant to child maltreatment, child protection, child alignment, parental alienation, pathological enmeshment, and related issues since those clinical conditions are very much related to behavior, including dysfunctional, pathological, and abusive behavior.

Likewise, he has several decades of experience practicing Forensic Medicine. A popular speaker, he has directed several hundred continuing education courses for physicians and other clinicians and presented over one thousand lectures on clinical reasoning, clinical problem-solving, and clinical decision-making. An internationally-known expert on alienation and estrangement – and how to distinguish one from the other – he is also an experienced expert witness, litigation consultant, and trial strategist.

REV. DR. JOHN KILLINGER

“Life is More than Getting to Enjoy Your Grandkids—a Whole Lot More!"

Most of us, being normal human beings, tend to focus a lot on the things that are presently bothering us or are grievously missing from our lives. We unconsciously magnify the importance of those particular things, victimizing ourselves with more pain and anxiety than is absolutely necessary.

Among almost all the alienated grandparents I have met—and I have met many--the fact that they can’t see or enjoy regular visits with their grandchildren has assumed an exaggeratedly large role in their thinking. I have found, in my own experience of living with alienation, that it is very helpful and often necessary to consciously minimize my concentration on my grandkids, to psychologically shrink the time I give to thinking about them, and to spend more time and concentration on the other aspects of my daily living. This doesn’t mean I love those precious grandchildren—there are four of them, now aged 11 to 17—any less. It simply means that I am not allowing my grief at being unable to see and be with them to color or distort the rest of my existence. Life is simply too great and too beautiful to allow this alienation factor to diminish the wonder and glory of it!

Dr. John Killinger, noted author, minister, and professor, has pastored eight churches, including the First Congregational Church of Los Angeles and Marble Collegiate Church in New York City, and has taught at such major universities as Vanderbilt, Princeton, and Chicago. His wife Anne was the author of A Son Is a Son Till He Gets a Wife: How Toxic Daughters-in-Law Destroy Families, the book that spawned the alienated parents and grandparent movement in America. He himself has written more than 70 books, including three volumes of From Poppy with Love: Letters from a Grandfather to the Grandchildren He Isn’t Allowed to See. He has appeared on numerous radio and TV programs across the U.S., and served for many years as a special seminar leader for chaplains in all branches of the American Armed Forces.

SUE CORNBLUTH, PSY.D

"What is Ambiguous Loss & Why Do Targeted Parents/Grandparents Need to Know about this To Cope with Emptiness"

Ambiguous loss is an unclear and unresolved loss that occurs without closure or clear understanding. This is what many targeted parents and grandparents are coping with on a daily basis. What is most devastating is that their children are still physically alive but psychologically they are gone. This kind of loss leaves a person searching for answers, and thus complicates and delays the process of grieving, and often results in unresolved grief.

Ambiguous loss can cause anxiety, depression, anger, yearning, frustration, panic, and other negative emotions including feelings of helplessness, hopelessness, and emptiness. One way to deal with this is to cultivate self-compassion. If you can learn to soothe yourself — especially through the use of specific techniques — then you are more likely to cope with the loss and emptiness.

This presentation will focus primarily on two things: (1) techniques to reduce both internal and external conflicts of your loss; and (2) how self-compassion can help to reduce emotional distress. The presentation will include methods to cope with ambiguous loss such as (1) becoming comfortable with ambiguity (2) reconstructing your identity and (3) developing hope.
This presentation will focus primarily on two things: (1) techniques that can reduce both internal and external conflicts; and (2) how self-compassion can help to reduce emotional distress. The presentation will include methods to foster self-forgiveness such as identifying, acknowledging, and accepting in order to lift spirits and enhance well-being. Related techniques will include journal writing, heart-holding, and positive self-talk. By the end of the presentation, participants will be able to identify specific steps they can take to reconnect with themselves and — most importantly — with their children and/or grandchildren.

Dr. Sue Cornbluth is a certified parenting expert, coach and thought leader with international recognition, specializing in high conflict divorce and parental/grandparent alienation situations.
In 2013 Dr. Sue established Dr. Sue & You LLC, a consulting & coaching firm working with parents to help them successfully move through their high conflict divorce situations and reunite with their children. She has reunited hundreds of families with her tools and techniques. Her passion and goal is to heal family conflict with compassion. She accomplishes this through her work educating and guiding parents and professionals.

Dr. Sue currently hosts a weekly radio broadcast in Philadelphia called “The Dr. Sue Show: Beyond Divorce: We Cure Conflict” on 860AM-Talk Radio. She also is the host of the television show “Dr. Sue and You” on Roku. Both shows educate the public about how you can become the solution to any conflict in your life.

Dr. Sue has served as a child abuse and victims’ rights expert. The exposure she gained as a lead expert during the Jerry Sandusky trial directly contributed to the growing demand for her expert opinion. She has gained global recognition and is contracted for speaking engagements around the world. The Women’s Distinctive Business Magazine recognized Dr. Sue as One of the Country’s Most Distinctive Women. She is a regular contributor as a mental health expert for network television stations including NBC, Fox and CBS. She has contributed to several national publications.
Dr. Sue resides in the suburbs outside of Philadelphia, Pennsylvania with her husband and two children. She holds a doctoral degree in Clinical Psychology and has worked as a Psychology Professor at Temple University.

CAROL GOLLY, PH. D, LCSW, RPT-S

"Weathering the Storm: Tips for Targeted Grandparents"

Grandparents facing the unnatural stress of being cut off from grandchildren may suffer emotional and physical consequences. Such consequences may include anxiety, depression, anger, complex grief and trauma, and resultant physical health issues. Managing such emotional turmoil and stress can be a profound challenge for affected grandparents. Dr. Golly will share information from grandparents and professionals regarding coping strategies and the building of emotional resiliency in order to build inner strength, self-compassion and confidence.

Carol Golly has a special interest in parent and grandparent alienation. She is a founding board member of Alienated Grandparents Anonymous, Inc. (AGA) and completed her doctoral work on grandparent alienation in 2019. She has 30 years of experience as a psychotherapist for children, adolescents, and families in Naples, Florida. Carol serves as a court-appointed therapist for children and families and as an expert witness in cases of child abuse, trauma, neglect, and parental alienation.

MODERATOR
PRESENTER
COLLEEN MURRAY, PH.D., LPC

"Mind Games You Can Play By Yourself…
…Because Sometimes It Is Not As Easy As Changing The Way You Think"

Sometimes changing our thoughts and thinking patterns about the pain of the loss is hard, particularly when everyday, everywhere you look there is a reminder of what was or what could have been—especially when the one for whom you are grieving is still alive.
This session will be focused on providing attendees with some practical techniques to enable them to mindfully respond in healthy ways to difficult situations.

In this session, we will discuss how, when overwhelming stress develops into a pattern of emotionally-driven reaction, one can apply certain techniques to maintain composure and mental balance in the midst of a painful circumstance they cannot presently change.

Colleen M. Murray, Ph.D., is a Licensed Practicing Counselor in Saint Robert, MO. Dr. Murray has an interest in better defining intimate partner violence to include parental alienation. She has spent many years working in the area of intimate partner violence and studying the effects and interventions for children subjected to intimate partner violence. Dr. Murray is in private practice with a focus on high conflict divorce and parental alienation. Dr. Murray assists families with co-parenting, reunification of alienated parent, and parent management techniques. Dr. Murray regularly testifies as an expert witness in high conflict divorce case. Dr. Murray speaks at continuing education conferences for family law attorneys and judges concerning how parental alienation effects children. Dr. Murray is also an adjunct professor at Drury University.

Colleen M. Murray is the owner of Victor’s Crown Christian Counseling Center, where she specializes in working with families struggling with high conflict divorce and parental alienation. Colleen is also an adjunct faculty member of Drury University. Colleen attended Campbell University and received her bachelor’s in Psychology. After graduation Colleen went on to serve in the United States Army where she received the Medal of Merit for her work in Homeland Security. After leaving the Army, Colleen went on to received her Master’s and Ph.D. in Mental Health Counseling from Capella University graduating summa cum laude and cum laude. Colleen conducted research in childhood trauma due to domestic violence. Colleen has three children; Ashley, Stuart and Joseph and lives in Saint Robert Missouri with her husband Daniel.

LINDA GOTTLIEB, LMFT, LCSW-R

"Erasing the Alienator’s Tapes"
Much has been written about the alienating parent’s malicious brainwashing of the child and likening it to the brainwashing in a cult. Surprisingly, however, insufficient recognition and attention has been paid to how the alienation process is a form of poisonous brainwashing of the alienated parent by the alienating influence and the aligned children or grandchildren.

What do I mean by this? What I mean is that the repetitive, ferocious, resolute crusade by the alienating parent and the aligned child or children to denigrate the alienated parent is an attack on the alienated parent’s self-esteem, self-confidence, dignity, cognitive faculties, emotional stability, ability to trust, competency as a parent, and ability to function interpersonally. These denigrating messages from the brainwashing often become internalized by the alienated parent. These messages then become tapes in the alienated parent’s head and—if allowed—are played incessantly—thereby leading to feelings of emptiness, worthlessness, and hopelessness.

But tapes can be edited, re-written, corrected—even entirely erased—with appropriate measures. This presentation will provide suggestions for how to alter or utterly discard the alienator’s tapes in your head in order to counteract these undesirable feelings, to enable you to again take charge of your life—like you once had—and to ultimately axe the alienator’s knack for playing with your head, pulling your strings like a puppeteer, and orchestrating your words like the dummy of the ventriloquist.

You have the ability to be in control of your own destiny, feelings, and self-perception. After all, you know all too well that, during the marriage, you had been the more effective parent, the more rational parent, the more devoted parent, and the more grounded parent. These are the tapes that you once had and which can be reinstated in the rightful place in your head.

Linda is a New York State Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Licensed Clinical Social Worker who is also a published author on family therapy and parental alienation. Linda has been frequently cited and referenced by other authors and experts in the field.

Linda was trained by the world-renowned, highly respected child psychiatrist, Salvador Minuchin. After she completed her training at the Minuchin Center for the Family, Linda served on the Center’s faculty from 2003-2007 where she trained child psychiatrists, psychologists, and other mental health professionals who wished to learn the techniques of Dr. Minuchin’s structural family therapy.

Linda’s professional services to 5000 children and their families in multiple settings and in multiple roles span 50 years. She began her work with 3000 adjudicated abused and/or neglected children in New York’s foster care system. Subsequent to this experience, Linda transitioned in 1994 into the mental health system at South Shore Child Guidance Center in Freeport, Long Island where she designed, implemented, and supervised a home-based crisis intervention program to prevent the psychiatric hospitalization of a child. Linda additionally accepted referrals and appointments from local family courts to provide family counseling and parent coordination services to parents who were engaged in adversarial custody conflicts.

In 2003, Linda focused her practice almost exclusively on helping parents settle their custody conflicts in the best interests of their children. After writing her 2012 book on parental alienation, Linda further concentrated her clinical practice on the sub-specialty of parental alienation-a highly dysfunctional family dynamic that is a form of child psychological abuse.

Based upon what Linda had learned from the clinical literature, from colleagues who are leading experts in the field of alienation, and from her extensive evidence-based practice with approximately 650 alienated children and with approximately 1000 children whose parents were undergoing separation/divorce but who did not experience alienation, Linda developed a specialized reunification intervention to treat unjustifiably severed/severely damaged parent-child relationships. The intervention had proven to be highly successful—even in cases in which the severed parent-child relationships exceeded 4 years.

In 2015, Linda further refined her specialized reunification intervention, and it became the treatment protocol she now employs at Turning Points for Families, her 4-day intensive intervention to jump-start unjustified severed/severely damaged parent-child relationships.

Linda further provides supervision in alienation and estrangement to custody evaluators, clinicians, forensic evaluators, and to other professionals who intervene in custody cases in which alienation is alleged. Linda also maintains a small practice testifying as an expert witness in family dynamics, alienation, estrangement, family therapy, and child abuse.

MARK D. MOSK, PH.D

"Resurrecting Hope in the Land of the Surreal"

Alienated parents and grandparents experience an overwhelming sense of loss and despair that pervades nearly every aspect of their lives. These distressing emotions often continue for long periods of time as they struggle for answers to the cause and nature of their unforeseen predicament, leaving them without a sense of understanding, direction, and clear purpose. Anguish replaces hope and anger displaces contentment, as fears about their new distorted reality come into focus. Fortunately, the behavioral health field offers resources and support that can help alienated family members establish resilience, instill hope, and enhance control in their lives. This presentation will provide insights, tools, and motivation that will empower parents and grandparents to cope with and thrive in the challenging world of alienation.

Dr. Mosk completed his doctorate in clinical psychology at Western University in London, Canada in 1982. Dr. Mosk began his career as a clinical and research psychologist at the UCLA School of Medicine, after which he developed and directed The Life Skills Center, a model treatment program for patients with serious mental illness for the California Department of Mental Health’s psychiatric hospital system. Since that time, Dr. Mosk has been providing customized professional services to help and guide individuals undergoing transitional periods in their lives, organizations experiencing significant changes, and parties involved in lawsuits.

As a highly trained clinician, Dr. Mosk has treated thousands of patients with a broad range of behavioral health disorders over his career. He is the coauthor of the Functional Capacity Assessment Profile, a clinical decision-support tool used to explore an individual’s ability to function effectively, to set treatment goals and to measure therapeutic progress.

In his capacity as a forensic evaluator and expert witness for over three decades, Dr. Mosk has conducted more than 1,000 comprehensive forensic examinations for courts in California and Illinois. He has extensive experience performing court-ordered mental health evaluations in child custody, workers’ compensation and disability matters, and competency exams in immigration cases. He similarly had been providing litigation support for attorneys that includes reviewing and analyzing experts’ work products, consulting on cross-examination strategies, reviewing records, and preparing litigants to undergo forensic interviews.

Dr. Mosk’s focus over the past decade has been on defining and assessing normative parenting behavior. He continues to develop the Parenting Profile Assessment System, a technology designed to help professionals organize their line of questioning about parenting activities and abilities, to simplify and structure the investigation process, uncover potential allegations by parents, maximize efficiency and derive behavioral data to supplement clinical findings. This approach is intended to help provide a richer composite of information to educate and inform the court, using a common language understood by all parties involved in the litigation.

His key interests lie in the area of parental alienation in divorce matters, which includes defining and measuring the discrete behavioral components and mechanisms involved in alienation. He is a staunch advocate for alienated family members. As well, he actively educates the legal profession and the court on the impact of parental alienation on families.

Dr. Mosk has been advising private and public sector behavioral healthcare companies on organizational, clinical, and business-related issues for over 30 years. His expertise in organization transformation, clinical service delivery, strategic planning, performance management, leadership development, and human capital optimization assists clients in improving operational effectiveness and boosting revenue. He identifies root causes of
organizational difficulties and recommends effective and often innovative solutions to align and optimize operational and workforce systems to foster organizational excellence.

Dr. Mosk brings a broad range of proficiencies in clinical protocols, outcomes measurement, population health strategies, and integrative medicine, as well as deep experience on the payer side of healthcare services, to offer clients a unique set of perspectives and skills to help solve their complex challenges. He is a widely published author, thought leader, and has lectured extensively to professional and lay groups on a wide variety of healthcare topics. He also has served on the faculty of several academic institutions.

We are so grateful for those who are sponsoring our symposium. Please use these sponsors as they truly have a concern for the cause.

october_2021_sponsor_video_-_compressed.mp4
File Size:	160402 kb
File Type:	mp4